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The Relationship Challenges Each Zodiac Sign Will Eventually Have To Confront

I grew up in a culture that values the spiritual nature of psychology and natural science, such as astrology. When you hear astrology, you might think of ‘pseudoscience’ (i.e., fake science). Because of how astrology has been marketed and packaged to the masses through things like daily horoscopes in magazines and various media forms, you might think it’s not real. 

But what astrology is truly concerned with is energy. And from that perspective, it’s essential to pay attention to how energy impacts you, your intuitive knowledge, your personality, and your relationship behavior.

Spiritual psychology incorporates this ancient wisdom that’s four thousand years old by bringing together these cultural, multidimensional, and holistic practices.

Today, we’re delving into the connection between nature and your relationship health through exploring and understanding various types of energies. So you can bring more self-awareness into your connections and enrich your romantic relationships.

How Astrology Impacts Your Mental Health

Astrology is undermined as a natural science because it lacks an understanding of the mechanism/way these systems work. Many natural sciences face this problem, and psychology, like astrology, is no different. 

What we do know though is that science is consistently validating ancient wisdom. For example, we now understand more than ever how energy shows up in the body, how it is stored in the body after a traumatic event, the impact trauma has on the central nervous system and the brain, and how adaptable the brain is to its environment.

Similarly, there’s evidence documented about atoms and cells in the body configuring themselves differently in reaction to environmental triggers. When you hear a delightful piece of music or loving words, your cells look very different than when you hear negative words such as ‘you disgust me.’ On a cellular level, there’s more openness and lightness with the first example, and there’s more clustered and closed organization in your cells with the second example. The impact is real. But it doesn’t have to be permanent. 

One way you can understand energy is through understanding the elements that exist in nature: Fire, Earth, Air, and Water. 

Zodiac Sign Elements and Their Strengths in Relationships

Fire

Fire Signs: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius

Qualities associated with them are Brave, Artistic, Confident, Passionate, Independent, Passionate, Loving, and Dynamic.

Fire, as a natural element, can have a life of its own. It can burn quickly and brightly or burn slowly while regenerating itself. Regardless of its form, it has intensity to it. Because of its nature, it requires careful nurturing, management, and maintenance. When you think of fire, you can think of its destructive nature but also of its warm soothing nature. If you’re a fire sign, you likely show up this way in your romantic relationships- with fiery passion and intense warmth. You lead from the heart.

This energy is very focused on change and “doing.” Unfortunately, this can translate into being impulsive and maybe even being perceived by others as temperamental. 

Recommendations: You can become overstimulated and overly committed because of this action-oriented energy. It’s important to remember to take your time and find steadiness. Consider how these qualities would impact your dating experiences and your romantic relationships. Do you jump in too quickly? Does your fire burn twice as bright but half as long?

Consider activities and techniques that balance your energy - just like the fire that can burn for hours if managed well; what helps sustain you? Examples of activities that can help you feel more harmonious are meditation, contemplative writing, reading, and slow walks in the morning when it’s cool. You can show up in your relationships with more focused energy when you’re able to ground this energy. 

In terms of therapy consider AIP-based (adaptive information processing) interventions such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and light therapy for your mood, especially during winter months. 

Earth

Earth Signs: Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn

Qualities associated with them are Open, Direct, Detail-oriented, Down to Earth, Grounded, Practical, Sensual, Hardworking, and Creative.

Earth signs are the most grounded of all the signs. Earthy people remind you to start with a solid foundation, to be steady, and to build gradually. From this perspective, you’re a loyal builder in your relationships and stick by your people through difficult times. If you’re an earth sign, you also most likely talk about things others avoid or feel ashamed about, which can help you build intimacy and closeness with those receptive to it.

This energy is very centered on acceptance. Unfortunately, this can be perceived as passive, slow, uptight, and cold in intimate relationships. When in reality, it’s focused on the depth of the relationship and how this can develop over time. The good news is, when there’s a solid foundation, this sign exudes sensuality expressed in tangible physical ways. If you belong to this group of signs, you likely pay attention to physical cues with your partner(s) when you have a deep connection.

Recommendations: To avoid getting stuck and stagnant, find a balance between structure/routine and variety in your activities - just like the earth that rotates around its axis. Body-based techniques are generally helpful for earth signs as you can be more susceptible to energy getting stuck in your body. Incorporate more greenspace into your daily or weekly routines by finding ways to spend time in nature. You might also consider somatic-based interventions when you’re looking into therapy such as Somatic Experiencing (SE), embodiment work, and clay art therapy.

Consider how this would impact your choice of relationships. For example, is a monogamous relationship the best option for you? Or would a more open and flexible relationship be better suited for you? If you’re in a monogamous relationship, how might you continue to bring variety and newness into it so different phases of your relationship gets a renewed sense of energy? 

Air

Air Signs: Gemini, Libra, Aquarius

Qualities associated with them are Witty, Social, Good-Listener/Communicative, Intellectual/Cerebral, Innovative, Eccentric, Multi-talented, and Adventurous.

Just like fire, air signs have an energy of change. When you think of air, you think of how it changes things. Air helps you move and generate energy, ideas, and action. You can be the breath of fresh air in your relationships or the forceful wind that uproots things. While this can bring a sense of adventure to your partners, it can also knock things off balance. 

This airy energy can keep things interesting. However, it may make you unpredictable to those who don’t know you well enough. This can be misinterpreted as indecisive and scattered. A good example of when this can happen is when you’re newly dating. Being communicative can be helpful here so you can thrive in your meaningful connections.  

Recommendations: Find ways to get grounded and get out of your head. Find ways to connect to your restorative energy so that your airy qualities can shine. Think about activities, places, people, and things that bring you this comforting energy. Then, engage with these more when you feel like you’re in your head. An example of this is meditation practices that focus on your body, artistic expression involving body movement such as dance, and breathing techniques such as Nadi Sodhana (alternate nostril breathing). 

Water

Water Signs: Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces

Qualities associated with them are: Imaginative, Empathetic, Emotional, Nurturing, Free, Sensitive, Self-Reliant, Powerful, and Intuitive.

Water as an element is refreshing, cleansing, and runs deep (just like the ocean). Because of its fluid nature, water needs a container. Otherwise, it’s free-flowing and runs the risk of drying up. From this perspective, security and safety are critical for you in your romantic relationships. When you have this, you can be a supportive partner.

Water also tends to take on what’s around it. This intuitive nature can lead you to pay attention to invisible, unspoken cues. Paying attention when you take on other people’s energies is important. You would be more susceptible to higher-intensity emotions, including but not limited to anxiety. 

Recommendations: Because of these unique qualities, you can get saturated - with feelings and energy. Connecting with what brings you comfort is key to maintaining your safety in relationships. Consider how quickly you get attached in your relationships. 

Techniques to manage the high intensity of emotions are also crucial and cathartic. Examples of what can be helpful to you: soaking in water/hydrotherapy/float therapy, creative artistic expression, and tapping techniques such as those used in EFT (Emotion-Focused Therapy) and ASSYST-R (Acute Stress Symptom Stabilization-Remote).

Understanding these natural elements and their impact on you can help you with improving many aspects of your relationships, such as your communication style, how you handle stress, knowing what’s helpful for you in finding your balance when you’re feeling off, knowing better what you crave, your moods, and your activities. From this perspective, you can change your relationships' pace and design them with what’s most aligned with your true nature. 

When you dig deeper here, you can have more insight into your needs and wants, be more attuned to yourself, and move more intentionally across the different seasons of your romantic relationships. You can understand when something isn’t working for you and know when to quit the right things at the right time or pivot as needed. 

From a therapy standpoint, it can help you find the right type of help that aligns with your nature, from the choice of the right therapist to the right treatment. 

As you move into this winter season, consider how the cold nature of the season could impact your element and how this translates into the energy you’re feeling and your behavior with your partner(s). Insight from this will help you calibrate and find your balance.

I would love to hear from you about how this resonated with you. Did it surface anything new? Was it a helpful reminder? What are your top three takeaways from this?

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Hiba Khatkhat

Hiba is a holistic psychotherapist specializing in trauma, couples treatment, and culture. She's passionate about solving mental health crises by practicing prevention. She brings over 18 years of experience working with individuals, couples, & families in her private practice. She is known for her work on the transmission of trauma and its impact on relationships.

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